The 103 Year Old Oliver Twins

Some time back, it was Two-Fer Tuesday, and I came into possession of a pair of Oliver No. 5 typewriters.  The seller was very glad that the Olivers were going to a loving home.

One was in incredibly good condition; it just needed a little cleaning.  The other was  dirty, rusty, and nonfunctional.

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These came to me in the winter – a time for sweaters, scarves and Olivers.

Finding two Oliver No. 5 typewriters here in the wilds of California is unusual – their  geographic territory is much further east of here.  It appears that they are both from 1913.

One has serial number 285132:

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The other one has serial number 342169:

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The Oliver in pretty good shape has a little rust and gunk and types with persuasion. It has a metal cover and wooden base.

The other Oliver is non-functional, very rusty, corroded and dirty. It needs a clean up and a new drawband.  It should be fine.

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They’re so cute. They’re holding hands.

So I had one for me and one to share. The rusty, nonfunctional Oliver is naturally more interesting to me, so I gave the one in better shape to Good Neighbor Brian.  Brian is such a great neighbor: he taught me how to repair enormous holes in lath and plaster walls, he showed up with a Sawzall when I was demoing my bathroom, he gave me a shop vac, and he’s helped me straighten out metal parts on my typewriters. He’s a Good Neighbor. He has always admired my Oliver No. 9 which shows he has Good Taste.

Brian’s new Oliver 5 has a base and a cover. No wonder it was in such good condition.  It was just a bit dusty and grimy.

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I took off the carriage so Brian could blow it out with his air compressor (set on a very low setting to avoid disturbing possibly loose pieces)

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I showed Brian how to take the carriage off and reattach it.  He’s a quick study:

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I gave him some pointers on taking care while cleaning it.  This Oliver is in such good condition that a lightly damp rag and some Renaissance wax would be all it needed.  Brian sent me an email:

 

Mary:

I can’t express the satisfaction involved with cleaning this beautiful typewriter.

-Good Neighbor Brian

 

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Zen Master Brian said that it is important to clean unfamiliar and complex machinery.  The act of physically touching the machine while cleaning will help you to later use it safely and confidently. It is important to become one with the machine.

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This is an old office chair that Brian is cleaning up.  He wants to use it at the desk where his Oliver No. 5 is to reside once it’s all cleaned up.  I told you he has Good Taste. And he likes junkers.

I bought 7/16″ inch cotton ribbon for the two Oliver No. 5s. I got one for Brian and one for me.  Oliver No. 5 typewriters don’t take ½” ribbon like an Oliver No. 9.  That size ribbon is too wide for the ribbon vibrator on an Oliver No. 5; it needs something just a hair smaller.  I bought these Oliver No. 5 ribbons from Tony Casillo of TTS Business Products on eBay.  I found an interesting article about Tony Casillo – he sounds like a right-on kind of guy.

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Brian is still working on polishing his Oliver No. 5, but when he’s done, we’ll throw in the new ribbon and let ‘er rip.

SmithBro in a Jam

An L.C. Smith & Bros. No. 5 stayed at my place for a few days for some help.  This SmithBro has been indulging in some hard living recently at Moe’s shop and needed an intervention.

At Moe’s, the carriage got jammed (inexplicably) way over to the right. I knew that if I left it that way, the typewriter might lose its balance and fall off a chair. I brought the SmithBro home to sober him up with black coffee and figure out what the heck was going on:

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Your tie’s undone, Mister.

Huh.

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“Lady, I think I’m gonna be sick…”

I didn’t know where to start. I just could not get that carriage to move. For about an hour, I poked and prodded. I coaxed and cleaned. Nothing. I went to the internet.  Fortunately, Knife141 had a similar problem. That guy. He. Has. Seen. Much.

Like Knife141’s typewriter, the problem seemed to come from the tab rack. I removed the two tab stops, wiggled the tab rack in back, pressed the tab bar in front and was finally able to move the carriage.

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I am not quite sure what I did, but after that, the carriage moved freely – squeakily and crustily because of a very dirty carriage track – but freely. The tab mechanism under the tab rack was a little higher on one side than the other. It was possibly bent. Strategically-applied PB B’laster de-gummed the moving parts of the tab mechanism and the tabbing began to function.

How old is this thing?  I found the serial number stamped inside the machine behind the tab bar:  192102-5

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This is a 1912 typewriter per Typewriter Database.

This machine was pretty dirty.  After an initial blow out out, I doused everything in mineral spirits.  I’m starting to warm up to mineral spirits. I love denatured alcohol for cleaning, but it is so dangerous around painted surfaces. A stray drop of denatured alcohol will eat into paint quickly.  Mineral spirits are a little more forgiving around paint.

The typewriter was typing great, even without a ribbon, but the platen was filthy:

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The platen on the old L.C. Smith standards pops out very easily.  You loosen a couple screws on each end of the platen and slide the retainer back:

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I popped the platen out and cleaned it with Soft Scrub:

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It is a 104 year old platen and it’s hard as a rock.  Thwack thwack thwack – even with three sheets of paper.

It started me thinking: how much of the typing experience on an old typewriter has to do with the condition of the platen?  I recently had a 100+ year old Underwood 5 stay with me, and it was a muted and delightful typing experience. It seemed to have a new-ish, soft-ish platen.  The other 100 year old typewriters that I have experienced (Royal 10, LC Smith 8, Fox 24, Oliver 9,  Century 10) have had rock-hard platens and been thwack-thwack-thwack experiences. They were springy and responsive typewriters, but very noisy.

Wow! That’s a handsome decal – it’s in such good shape:

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Magritte couldn’t have designed a better decal. Is that disembodied hoof trying to type – or destroy the typewriter? What does it all mean? Horsie the Destroyer.

The back space wasn’t working, so I investigated underneath the machine.

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Clevis!!! Er – link spring. Old-timey clevis!!  This is the technology that has been be-deviling me as I work on the 1960s SCM machines at The Shop at Flywheel Press. Snapped clevises (link springs) have be-deviled people for the past 100+ years.

Back space linkage is re-attached and all is well:

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I scrubbed the grimy typebars with Scotch Brite and got the gumminess to recede with an application of mineral spirits.  A couple letters were still not freely striking.  As it turns out, their key levers were bent going into the comb that is the key lever guide. I had to straighten them out with pliers so they could move freely.

Baby needs a new pair of shoes

The feet were completely gone – just the remnants of old rubber in the hole.  I made new feet out of cork:

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and colored them with Sharpie and India ink:

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They look really good, but I want to get some rubber test tube stoppers as I think they will be more durable in the long run.

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This SmithBro is so articulate! “QWERTYUIOP¼,” he said. So charming and well-spoken. And he is quite a handsome fellow now that’s he has showered and brushed his teeth.  I should fix him up with my sister.

Two Royals and Birthday Lemonade

I went into Mozo’s about a week and half ago to check out Moe’s latest find: a 1970 Hermes 3000 with script typeface – mint condition:

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Sweet!

1970 Hermes 3000
Serial number: 7059922

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It had the original manual as well as an original brush:

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Not only that, it had the original warranty card:

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I felt like I should have completed the warranty and mailed it in.

There was also a receipt for a draw band repair. It cost $8.50 to get a draw band repaired in 1973:

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My question: how does a draw band snap in just three years of use?  Hermes was obviously not using 80lb fishing line for its draw bands.

I congratulated Moe on her find and told her that while I wasn’t in the market for a mint condition script Hermes 3000, she would certainly find a happy buyer.

Typewriters in need

Moe asked me if I was interested in cleaning up a couple typewriters for her friend Tim.  Tim is a retired newspaper reporter with a fondness for typewriters. He had two portable Royals that needed care. Both were very dirty, one with a broken draw band, one with a lot of rust and a cemented segment. I told Moe that I was up for the job.

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I love before and after typewriter photography. I may have a fetish for decay—if I know that it’s a temporary state. Here I indulge in what I call “Beforn”, a form of ruin porn:

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That’s a dead spider by the spool

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Aahh – it speaks to me…”help meeee…”

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White residue on the keys. Baby Blue had the same stuff. It’s probably some chemical precipitate from the 1950s plastic of the keys.

Bad News and the Philosopher Queen

Moe called me the next day while I was working on Tim’s Royals.  Bad news.  The Hermes 3000 got dropped.  Could I come in and take a look?  Of course.

It didn’t look too bad:

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Uh-oh.

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Moe was philosophical about the Hermes.  She said: “I don’t get upset about that sort of thing.  Why should I?”

Indeed, she’s right. Why should you?

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Philosopher Queen Moe, her bevy of beauties, and a stable of stallions

When Life Gives You a Broken Hermes, Make Lemonade

Moe asked me if I could do anything to get it typing again.  The carriage was mashed into the body and not moving.  The plastic carriage housing was shattered and the cool margin indicator was pulled out. Blurg.

Then I had an idea.  My birthday was this past weekend.

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I had my husband buy the mashed Hermes for my birthday (because nothing says “Happy-Birthday-Darling” like a broken typewriter).  Now I will be able to dismantle and investigate the complex mechanisms slowly and methodically at my own pace and not worry that I may never get it back together and working.  At this point, it’s an interesting parts machine, but who knows? Perhaps it will type again.

Here are the ladies of Mozo’s. Roia (mother of the Arduino Kid) is posing with the LC Smith and Moe is posing with the Parisian wrestlers:

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I think this poster of turn-of-the-century Parisian wrestlers could look great framed and hung in the bathroom:

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Winter Olympiette

The local community arts space I have been working with has a whole fascinating jumble of typewriters, but this little white Olympia (Nakajima) Olympiette Model S10 caught my eye. It was made in Japan, probably some time in the 1970s or 1980s.  The serial number is #1004642 if that helps with dating.

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I want to go skiing and then have hot chocolate

White is an impractical color for a typewriter.  It gets smudged and grimy so quickly just doing normal things that you would to a typewriter (like typing).  However, this Olympiette is such a pretty little snowflake that I forgive it.  It is a clean breath of frosty air. I love the winter white and charcoal keys combination. It reminds me of the Frozen North of Alaska, where I was born. I come from the land of the ice and snow, from the midnight sun where the hot springs flow.

Pretty but Plastic

The outer shell is white plastic and there’s plenty of plastic inside the machine as well. The Olympiette had two broken ribbon spindles, so the ribbon wouldn’t advance on typing. The ribbon spindles were made of plastic and had snapped off. 😦

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I found one broken spool spindle nestled in the ribbon spool mechanism and glued it back on with super glue. That repair lasted about two minutes.

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So I got a paper clip, cut it down and made little spool spindles.

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I wedged them into a well in the spooling mechanism and used Super Glue to hold them in place.

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My repair will get thoroughly tested as the kids camps and classes roll through The Shop at Flywheel Press and hammer the heck out of this little Olympiette.

I love the way this typewriter looks, so how does this little white snowflake type?  Pretty good, but a bit jangly. The ribbon cover is missing its plastic retaining tabs (broken off) so the lid rattles quite a bit while typing. Maybe a little strategically-applied Sugru is in order. So: rattly, but still, I kind of like it!

The only issue for me is the top row of keys: the keys are tilted back at an angle.  I am fairly short so I have to lift out of my seat to see the top row of keys (obviously I am not a blind touch-typer).  It’s a subtle angle, but it makes it hard for me to use the top row of keys.

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But I love the styling of this typewriter. It’s got a bad case of pretties.

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The “AUTOMATIC” button is loads of fun.  It’s like the POWER-SPACE on a SCM.  I guess it’s there so you don’t have to reach up to the carriage release to move around on a page. Pressing the button sends the carriage stuttering along like a machine gun.  I don’t know why I would want it to do that and make all that noise, but it’s fun noise.

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I took the repaired Olympiette and one of the many SCM Smith-Corona typewriters with fixed clevises back to The Shop at Flywheel Press in the trunk of my car…

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…and I picked up another couple typewriters to fine-tune. The Penncrest Concord electric has a fun script typeface, but several of the linkages are snapped off, including the important letter “A”.  The Royal 10 is currently a “display” typewriter, but I think it will be a good typer. I bought special Royal-style spools for it, so it had better type.

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House Call

A little over a week ago, I went down to The Shop at Flywheel Press to drop off the cleaned-up Underwood Jewell and to work on typewriters that needed maintenance before the big Love on the Run Valentine’s Day event.

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I brought along a little repair kit with tools, mineral spirits and new ribbons. The ten or so typewriters at the Shop were in “sort of” functional condition. There were a lot of sticky keys. There were some unresponsive keys due to popped linkages. Many of the typewriters needed new ribbons. I brought red and black ribbons that I order in bulk from Oregon.

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The Underwood Jewell is back in the harness

There was a SCM Galaxie that was missing a couple key tops. I made some temporary key tops for it so that fingers wouldn’t get stabbed during the Love on the Run event. I used synthetic cork – natural cork was a bit too crumbly.

I cut to the right size and shape with an utility knife:

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I bet you can’t tell which two are replacements 🙂

These were temporary for the Valentine’s event. I bought some SCM key tops on eBay and swapped them out. They are a little yellow, but they look better than the cork.

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Does anyone need a replacement SCM-style key top?  I have lots left over, so let me know.

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The Curse of the Clevis

I believe that the y-shaped linkage that attaches to the individual typebars is called a clevis.  I had seen snapped clevises before on a SCM Galaxie with a cemented segment at Moe’s shop. A couple linkages had popped off because the typebars were immobilized in the segment, possible victims of WD-40 syndrome. Once the typebars were freed with cleaning, I was able to re-attach the linkage (with some difficulty).

This is what I am calling a clevis linkage:

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This is how a clevis linkage should attach to a typebar:

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Four out of the five Smith-Corona typewriters at the Shop had one or more snapped typebar linkages. I worked on a Pennecrest Concord (a re-badged S-C), two SCM Galaxies, and a Smith-Corona Sterling. I got most of them re-attached before the Love on the Run event.

This Reddit thread has some good advice for re-attachment of popped linkages: take a small, thin screwdriver and insert it into the “Y” of the clevis.  Turn the screwdriver to open the “Y” and move the linkage into position near the hole at the base of the typebar. Get the linkage into position and then rotate your screwdriver so that the “Y’ flattens and the linkage snaps to the typebar. I found it easiest to work from beneath the typewriter for linkages at the bottom of the segment( e.g. “G”) and from above for linkages nearer the top (e.g. “A”)

The Case of the Cloven Clevis

After I re-attached the snapped linkages, I saw that the “M” key on a SCM Galaxie had a broken clevis – it was missing half of the “Y”. What to do?

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I think a thin piece of metal and some duct tape are in order. Stay with me here.

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I cut the stainless tie strapping to a piece about an inch long.  Using a nail, I punched a hole in the end.

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I then attached it to the broken clevis with duct tape.

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This is probably the worst looking repair of my short career, but it’s working and the letter “M” types again.  It will get a full workout from kids at camps and classes, so we will see how this holds out over time.

The Love on the Run event at Flywheel Press was a great success:

My daughter and I stopped in at the event. There was a pleasantly diverse crowd of old and young – little tiny kids, college-types, parental-types, retired folks.  It was so gratifying to walk in and see someone typing out love notes on the Underwood Jewell.

My daughter found herself attracted to a script Olivetti Lettera 32.  She typed out a love letter in Cat language:

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Jewell in the Rough

Some time ago, I heard through the grapevine that there was a neighborhood community art space that had a lot of typewriters.  Of course I had to check it out.

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Jenn and Amber run The Shop at Flywheel Press, a “locally cultivated community art and design center”. I went down to the shop sometime before Christmas and – whoa – they had typewriters!

There were about ten typewriters scattered throughout the space. The Shop uses them for camps and classes and events.  These typewriters are working girls – no shelf queens, no display divas.

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Well, there is one display diva:

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Remington Porto-Rite

The Shop at Flywheel Press also has printing presses:

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I need to know these people.

I chatted briefly with Jenn, one of the proprietors, and mentioned that I was a typewriter hobbyist who enjoyed tinkering with typewriters.  I left contact info as well as my blog address in case they needed help with their typewriters.

Last week, Jenn left a comment in a recent blog post – was I still interested in helping them with their typewriters?  They were having a Love on the Run Valentine’s Day event and were hoping to have operational typewriters that attendees could use to type love letters on.

I went right over and checked out the typewriters.  Most were in a less-than-completely-functional state. Dry ribbons, no ribbons, sticky keys, missing key tops, broken-ish.  They needed some attention before they could work their Valentine’s Day event.

One particularly sad specimen that caught my eye was a 1954 Underwood Jewell.  Jenn said that a painter had found it in an empty house that he was painting and had given it to the shop.  Paint-splattered and gummy, it called to me.  I asked it I could take it home and try to clean it up.  Jenn agreed.

I brought the Underwood Jewell home to my kitchen counter operating room and started scrubbing first with water.  Then I tried Dawn dish detergent and water.  Then I tried Scrubbing Bubbles. No luck. The paint splatters weren’t going anywhere.

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The blender looks on with grim satisfaction.  Why the schadenfreude, Blender?

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I didn’t want to do it, but I pulled out the rubbing compound.

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It’s a fine abrasive and will take the paint off. I applied the rubbing compound and rubbed and rubbed – the paint splatters started to fade.

If the typewriter belonged to me, I would have continued with the rubbing compound despite the fact that with repeated rubbing, it will slightly flatten the crinkle paint texture.  It wasn’t mine, so I got it to a “respectably splattered” condition and stopped.

1954 Underwood Jewell Portable
Serial Number : W2557296

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Why is Jewell misspelled?

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Crazy Eights

This weird “8” with the rakish little curl is funny.  Many Underwoods of the 1930s through the 1960s have this “8”.  Other brands don’t have this “8”, do they?

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This is her good side:

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Going by what I see in Typewriter Database, it looks like this style Underwood metal badge was used in 1953, 1954 and 1955. Best badge ever:

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Correction: Bill M.’s Underwood Ace has the best Underwood insignia ever.  His badge says “Speeds the World’s Business” around the globe of the insignia. Check out his blog header.

This Underwood Jewell types rough. Several of the typebars were bent and catching in the type guide.  I straightened them out using a light hand.

There doesn’t seem to be any sound insulation in the machine – it has a rough, clattering sound and feel. Did it ever have insulation?  So, so cool looking, but the typing experience is so loud and distressing.  I will cut this typewriter some slack because it has obviously lived a very tough life and been through great hardship.

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I returned the Underwood Jewell to The Shop at Flywheel Press and started working on the other typewriters….there was so much to be done before the Love on the Run event.

To be continued…

Adventure in Style: S-C Clipper

I brought home a stylish little Smith-Corona Clipper from Moe’s shop for a some R&R at my typewriter spa. It wasn’t too dirty. I took it outside and blew out the dust bunnies.

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By serial number (4C135275), it looks like a 1946 Clipper:

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In addition to the usual complaints (dry ribbon, grime, dust, sticky keys), the typewriter had some rotated keys – the worst being the letter “E” and the letter “N”.

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I read on Reddit that I could rotate the key tops back into proper position by using my finger or an eraser.  My finger didn’t work, but I found that by pressing down firmly with a good eraser, I was able to rotate the key tops back into position. It was slow going, but the key rotated a tiny bit at a time into place. Though my photo doesn’t show it, I supported the key top from below with my fingers.

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So much better:

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This took some time – it moved very slowly into correct position

The typewriter also had a very strong moldy smell.  Much of it came from the case which had mildew spots inside.  I wiped it down with soap and water and put it outside to dry in the sun – this helped a lot.

Under the hood of the machine, I found that the typewriter ribbon itself was very fusty.  Out with the old and in with the new ribbon.  That made a big difference. I found that the felt insulation under the ribbon cover still had a slightly musty smell, so I sprayed a little Febreze air freshener on it.  That seemed only to mask the odor. Upshot: changing the ribbon was key to a better smelling machine.

Speedline Style

Cleaned up, this typewriter is quite a looker. This machine has beautiful Speedline curves and stylish glossy band around the base.

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Look at that elegant profile:

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History Time

So what is the story behind the S-C Clipper’s name? What is that plane on the front decal?

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From what I’ve read, it’s a Boeing B-314 Clipper:

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By Boeing Aircraft [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

The Boeing B-314 Clipper was a long-range flying boat made between 1938 and 1941 for Pan American Airways. It was one of the largest aircraft of the time.

Pan Am’s Clippers were outfitted for luxury air travel and long transoceanic flights.  In 1940, Pan Am’s flight from San Francisco to Honolulu was 19 hours. With seats that could be converted into beds, a lounge and dining area, galleys crewed by fine chefs, and service by white-coated stewards, this was the height of dee-luxe travel. A cross-section of the Clipper shows that this was no modern economy coach experience.

Traveling in this fashion wasn’t cheap.  A one-way ticket circa 1940 from San Francisco to Hong Kong was listed as $760 (or $1,368 round-trip).  In 2015 dollars, that’s $12,866.64 one-way and $23,159.95 round-trip (per Bureau of Labor Statistics CPI Inflation Calculator)

During World War II, the Clipper fleet was pressed into military service, transporting personnel and equipment during the war.

The last Pan Am 314 was retired in 1946, the same year that this little S-C Clipper was made.

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The name Clipper brought to mind style and adventure.  I don’t know whether Pan Am or Boeing had an agreement with Smith-Corona for use of the name Clipper; perhaps it was some kind of cross-promotion arrangement. It’s a little strange.  It would be like having a Dell computer called the Concorde with a little Concorde jet on it.

Here’s a short Pan Am clip from the 1950s looking back on the Clipper’s history:

Here is another video which has good interior shots of the Clipper (though I find the watermark a little distracting):

Check out more pictures of the B-314 Clipper »

I returned the beautiful little Smith-Corona Clipper to Moe’s shop with attached care and feeding instructions (don’t use WD-40 inside your typewriter, what to do about ribbons, yadda yadda yadda, and links to important places like The Classic Typewriter Page, Typosphere.net, TWDB, Typewriter Facebook group, Typewriter Talk).

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At Moe’s I picked up a vintage light meter for my son who is a Camera Geek.

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Moe had this wonderful bird (crow?) sculpture in the shop.

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I like that thing. The crow is my spirit animal.

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CAW!

The Squatter: Hermes 3000

Last week, I dropped off the cleaned-up Royal KMM at Moe’s shop.

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While I was there, Moe asked me to take a look at a couple new typewriters she had gotten in. One was a S-C Clipper in stinky/dirty condition but fine fettle typing-wise. I told Moe I would take the Clipper home, clean her up, throw in a new ribbon and bring her back.  Some of the key tops are rotated in peculiar directions, so I will try to put them right.

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The other typewriter was displayed precariously (Moe-style) on an unreliable-looking pile of things.

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It was a very nice 1963 Hermes 3000, serial number 3184055

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The case was very dirty, but contained the manual and one brush.

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ACK – that horrible ribbon.  I couldn’t leave it like that.

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I told Moe I would take the Hermes 3000 home for a clean-up and new ribbon.  That would give me chance to play with a Swiss-made typewriter for a little while.

Easier Said than Done – Hermes 3000 Bottom Cover Removal

I brought the 3000 home and did a light cleaning. It didn’t need much. There was a service ticket from 1976 taped inside the ribbon cover.   The Hermes 3000 appears to have spent the last 40 years protected inside its case.

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The machine had some eraser crumbs, so I decided to remove the bottom cover so that I could thoroughly clean the insides.

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First I unscrewed the four feet.  I assumed that the bottom cover would pop right off. No. The back part of the bottom cover pops off easily, but I ended up having to tilt the machine up from the bottom cover like this and sliding it to clear the tabs that hold the space bar in the front of the machine.

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I then took it outside and carefully blew out the dust and eraser crumbs (and stray paper clips).

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I then wiped it down, put it back together and considered the machine.

The Popular Oddball

Seen through my 21st century lens, this machine is pretty funky looking. Is it a “classic” example of mid-century industrial design? I don’t know. I think it was weird then and it is weird now.

To me, the design is smart — it makes the offbeat desirable. Many people (though not all) look at the Hermes 3000 and say, “That’s really weird looking, but I love it”. The Hermes 3000 has an oddball sophistication which may explain its popularity among collectors. It is the second most popular model at Typewriter Database behind the Royal Quiet De Luxe.

Cute As a Bug

It then struck me that the Hermes 3000 reminds me of a VW Beetle. Once I saw it, I couldn’t unsee it.

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The Hermes 3000 even has little bug antennae.

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Not an Hermès bag but an Hermes bug.

I love those squat, plumpy curves.

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Lastly (and serious collectors, don’t hate me for this) the Hermes 3000’s weird bulbosity brings to my feverish mind these things as well:

That’s enough of that. No more peyote for me.

And about that seafoam and mint green color combo: apparently they were very “happening” colors back in the day as seen in:

I think that the Hermes 3000 pulls off an impressive feat: it manages to make the seafoam and mint green combo tasteful and timeless.

The Umbrella that Wasn’t

What I thought was an umbrella printed on the back of the machine is actually a stylized crossbow, a symbol that was used as the Swiss “mark of origin” starting in 1931 (at least according to one source).

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Pronounced Problems

Pronouncing “Hermes” is problematic for me. It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma. I cannot bring myself to pronounce Hermes as “her-meez”. It’s way too close to “herpes”.

Old-timey Hermès machines (such as this 1923 Hermès 2 in Typewriter Database have decals that show an è in the name “Hermès” leading me to assume that it is pronounced “Air-mez”, like the luxury brand.

When did Hermes lose l’accent grave on the second e? Sometime after the Hermès 3 apparently.

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Without the accent, I suppose that the pronunciation should be “Airm”. I will have to check that with my French-speaking Swiss friend Sophie and confirm. Maybe they do things differently in Switzerland.  While I await confirmation, I will continue to call this an “Hermès Trois Mille (Air-mez Trwa Meel)” because I took French in high school.

So how does it type? I can’t touch-type (I must have been absent the day they taught typing at school). I hunt and peck very fast and really slam the keys, so the “mushy” feel of the Hermes 3000 that many people complain about makes no difference to me. My professional opinion: it’s a really good typewriter.

The Squatty Squatter: When Typewriters Won’t Go Home

After the clean-up, the Hermes 3000 took up residence in an unused back bedroom. The darn thing would not go home to Moe’s shop.  The Hermes 3000 kept looking at me solemnly with its bulging minty-green eyes.  “Good gravy, 3000! Go home to Moe’s”, I said. Oh my goodness, it WINKED at me.

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So now I have a squatter in my home. I gave Moe a bunch of money and resigned myself to the fact that I have a new face in the house. It’s not the worst thing in the world.

A Royal Visitor

I temporarily fostered a Royal KMM from Moe’s shop – it cleaned up nicely. I blew out the insides, doused the internal mechanics with mineral spirits and repeated the blowout.  I then lubricated the sticky rails and the tab system with a little PB B’laster and scrubbed the outside with Scrubbing Bubbles.  Lastly, I threw a new ribbon in her.

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Special Love: My Baby Blue

While I was out of town at the holiday wintering grounds with my herd, Moe from my favorite junk shop called and left a message: could I please come to her shop and take a look at a typewriter?

When I got back into town, I dropped by Moe’s. She had sweet little baby blue Royal Quiet De Luxe that a lady wanted to buy for her daughter, but it was all “jammed”.

The carriage lock was engaged.  I unlocked it and all was well.

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I remember when this typewriter had come in – before Thanksgiving it was. The carriage lock was engaged then, and I unlocked it so that people could test typing on it. I guess someone locked it again.

The typewriter was very dirty and needed a new ribbon, so I asked Moe if I could bring it home and clean it up.  Of course, yes.

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The serial number is AB3175632 which would make this a 1956 Royal QDL.

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I brought the typewriter home and looked it over.  I washed the outside down with soapy water and used my new favorite dollar-store degreaser on tough grimy areas, LA’s Totally Awesome.

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The blender photobombs AGAIN

The key tops had a resistant gray and white film that took a lot of scrubbing with green ScotchBrite to remove. I was careful around the printed letters.

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The machine had chunks of greasy lint hanging from its insides. I first blew out the machine with compressed air and then doused all the internal mechanics with mineral spirits and then blew wet, dirty chunks out with more compressed air. I don’t usually use mineral spirits, but I wanted to use something that wouldn’t evaporate quickly.

While I scrubbed the type, I noticed that the typeface was something a little different. I couldn’t wait to throw a new ribbon in and see what printed out.

What typeface is this? Herald Pica?

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I fell in love a little with this Royal portable. The machine seemed just keen to please and was so pleasurable to type on.

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After the clean up, I took the Royal QDL back to Moe’s. Moe’s shop was its usual jumble of fascinating objects perched in precarious positions. There was a new arrival, a golden Olympia Monica, hanging out on a couch in the shop.

The Monica was beautiful shade of yellow/gold.  I took a closer look:

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Someone will sit on it if you leave it here, Moe.

It worked great. German keyboard. The label says that was made in the United Kingdom:

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Hmm. The serial number is 5693315. I will go back and take some more (less blurry) pictures and add it to the TWDB.

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I poked around in the Olympia for bit, but then it was time to leave. It was with a reluctant heart that I left the baby blue QDL at Moe’s, but I was grateful for the experience of it. I had scrubbed the carry case and attached care and feeding instructions.

Goodbye, Baby Blue.

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Time for a sing-along:

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Christmas Spice

Like caribou, our herd made the eastern migration this winter holiday.  Fortunately, there was no calving en route.

Slow-moving ruminants, we crossed the Great Plains with a special case:

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I was nervous as we brought it through the TSA checkpoint.  I wasn’t sure what sort of hoops I might have to jump through.  It went through the x-ray machine with no raised eyebrows. I was weirdly disappointed that they did not even open the case.

On the airplane, the case fit perfectly under the seat in front of me.

We joined the rest of the herd in the eastern wintering grounds and grazed to fill our calorie-depleted bellies.

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On Christmas morning, my mother-in-law (MIL) opened the case I had hauled cross country to find…beautiful Posh Spice, the 1938 Corona Sterling.

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My MIL gave me a beautiful glass typewriter ornament from Poland.  It is a mythological creature, a cross between a Continental and a Royal with the magical powers of supernatural snappiness:

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My MIL is a superb typist. She has been looking for a typewriter for light correspondence and envelopes and asked me my opinion of this typewriter.

I knew that I could find a better typewriter for her.

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Frankly, I have never gotten along with Posh. She’s the Queen Bee in our house, and all the other junkers felt plain uncomfortable around her.

Please don’t think that gifting Posh Spice to my MIL means I don’t love my MIL.  It means I believe that my MIL will be the perfect wrangler for this typewriter.

My mother-in-law is 100% alpha – she can put Posh in her place. Posh will start with her tiresome, “My mother raised me to be admired…” routine and my MIL will silence her with one withering look and put her to work.

After gifting, we spent a busy day cooking a traditional Cuban Christmas dinner: roasted pork, black beans, rice, yucca, plantains, pineapple salad and flan.

A Christmas Memory

The next day, my MIL and I pulled out Posh Spice and typed out a post-mortem of the previous day’s food and activities, critically evaluating the menu and suggesting changes for next year’s dinner.

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Small woodland creatures emerged to try their hand on Posh Spice:

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My own mother enjoyed typing up documentation of her cooking experiments. She used a lovely narrative style in her recipes. Here are my mother’s tamale notes from 1983:

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My mother did not stint on the lard in her tamales. Her tiny tamales were about the size of a fat cigar and absolutely delicious.  I may make a tribute tamale batch for family and friends to celebrate the new year.

Wishing all of you the very best in food and typing in 2016!

A Tropical Breeze: Voss Bel Air

Here’s a quick recap: about a month ago, I bought a Voss De Luxe in terrible cosmetic condition but in good mechanical condition.  My daughter had requested a “project” typewriter that we could paint.

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No regrets

I wanted a machine that I wouldn’t feel guilty about repainting.

I sandblasted the lower shell of the machine at a local community workshop called TechShop:

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Also at TechShop, I powder coated the lower shell in a color my daughter picked out: Tropical Breeze.

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The result: a typewriter with a strong resemblance to a 1957 Chevy Bel Air:

By GTHO (Own work) [CC BY-SA 4.0], via Wikimedia Commons

By GTHO (Own work) [CC BY-SA 4.0], via Wikimedia Commons

The Pearl of the Antilles

Now that it’s all back together, this Voss brings to mind the Yank Tanks of Cuba, those carefully maintained classic American cars that prowl the streets of Havana to this day. My daughter is (mathematically speaking) a quarter Cuban. Her grandfather left Havana around the time this Voss rolled off the assembly line in Wuppertal. Perhaps my daughter’s genes are calling out for the Tropical Breezes of Cuba.

I leave you with the tropical sounds, colors, and cars of Cuba: